As a nurse case manager, I have been trained in motivational interviewing. What is that? Well it is a way of working with a patient that encourages them to find their own answers rather than be told what to do by me. We listen for something called Change Talk; this is when patients start talking about what they would like to see change and how they would see accomplishing that change. One of the things that we assess is how ready is someone ready to change and how confident are they that they can change. Then we ask what it will take for them to be more confident or ready.
I was seeing a dentist yesterday for my TMJ. It was my first visit and she asked about my exercise program. I explained that I had been real good for most of last year, but that I had stopped working out about 6-8 weeks ago. Then she asked me, "what would it take for you to start exercising again?" DING, DING...I immediately knew what she was doing: Motivational Interviewing!
While I expect my Health Coach will use motivational interviewing, I did not expect it from my TMJ doctor. So once again, here I am looking at what will it take to get me back into the habit of working out? Talking with my friend and co-worker Bonnie, she pointed out all that I have on my plate and continue to take on at work and home. She has a good point, but I see my life is just that, life. So how do I find my energy? I'm not sure, but exercising is something I do need to bring back in. I feel better, I look better, and I sleep better.
I have the knowledge, now if I can recognize the change talk within myself and hold on to it, I think I can find a way to keep my spirits up and feel less defeated. It's worth a try :)
Friday, January 27, 2012
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Do I give myself time or do I push?
Trying to decide, how much do I push. I am thinking I am trying to put too many goals in place right now. One of the things that I am doing is making a weekly goal.
My goals this week are to eat 2 pieces of fruit while at work; this is attainable. My other goal for this week was to walk the parking garage twice this week. I realized that this goal is sort of attainable. I have appointments the rest of the week and I am hoping to have lunch on Friday w/ Kat and the twins. Given that, it seems today is the only day I could walk, and I don't feel like it.
I didn't walk, instead sat at my desk reading. Also, while having a very good lunch of salad, went and bought trail mix and ate the whole package :( Really fighting the munchies again. Oh well, I just keep plugging away towards my goal.
This process must be one of the most demoralizing processes out there. Talk about feeling like a failure if you can't do it. I mean, its just food right? How weak are you if you can't resist food? There is so much revolving around this that makes me feel less than it is exhausting. I'm tired and dragging. I just want to curl up in a ball and hide. I want to pull in my family and just hibernate. Can't do it, but it would be nice...
My goals this week are to eat 2 pieces of fruit while at work; this is attainable. My other goal for this week was to walk the parking garage twice this week. I realized that this goal is sort of attainable. I have appointments the rest of the week and I am hoping to have lunch on Friday w/ Kat and the twins. Given that, it seems today is the only day I could walk, and I don't feel like it.
I didn't walk, instead sat at my desk reading. Also, while having a very good lunch of salad, went and bought trail mix and ate the whole package :( Really fighting the munchies again. Oh well, I just keep plugging away towards my goal.
This process must be one of the most demoralizing processes out there. Talk about feeling like a failure if you can't do it. I mean, its just food right? How weak are you if you can't resist food? There is so much revolving around this that makes me feel less than it is exhausting. I'm tired and dragging. I just want to curl up in a ball and hide. I want to pull in my family and just hibernate. Can't do it, but it would be nice...
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Moving forward...at a snail's pace
As I mentioned in my previous blog, I have hooked up with a Health Coach through Kaiser to help me stay on track and move forward in my quest for health...has it worked...well I think the Chocolate Cake I inhaled last week would say no. Of course, I'm on Prednisone right now, so my hunger is insatiable. If I was given the chance, I could just sit and eat and read for the next week and I'd be happy.
So what have I done with the Health Coach? We have spoken twice, the first time was an assessment, the second time was a check in on my goals. My first goals were to focus on my diet some, make sure I'm getting enough nuts and avocado into my diet. I was successful with that one. Now I am working on making sure that I log my food at least 5 times each week. In the meantime, I received a workbook that helps me to really look at things. Look at when I eat, what I eat, how I eat. Things that I am aware of w/ my kids, my patients, my wife, but not myself.
So for this week my goals are to eat 2 pieces of fruit at work each day. This isn't too hard for me as it is something I usually do, but I have found myself getting slack, so I thought I'd bring it back to the forefront. I have also made a goal of walking the parking lot here at work twice this week. Again, it is something that I can do, but have gotten out of the habit, so it is time to focus on it again.
The thing that I find most motivating is a card I received in the mail with my workbook that says when my next appointment with my Health Coach is but at the top, hand written in blue Sharpie, is Keep working towards your goal! It is amazing how that gives me a sense of I can do spirit. The spirit that brings back my strength and belief in myself. Trying to keep myself focused on the body's response to food and what I put into it rather than the emotional baggage that goes with the sabatoge and feeling of defeat. It's not easy, but I have written down a goal and am now working towards that. One week, one day, one meal, one snack, one hour at a time.
As I was walking by the lab this morning on my way to my office, I noticed that there was no one waiting for labs, so I made a quick detour and had my HA1c (diabetes test) drawn. Now considering I have had issues with eating, not activly restricting my diet, and not exercising, I was pretty sure my test would be greater than 8.0 and probably close to 9.0 which would show that my diabetes is very out of control. My lab came back at 7.1 which means it is slightly out of control, but not by much. Preference is below 7.0.
Not only was I relieved, I realized that all of the changes we made last year to our diets has translated into a healthier lifestyle. I felt like I had lost control and undone everything I had accomplished last year, but this shows that didn't happen. I do have to say, my last A1c in July of 2011 was 6.7, so it has increased in the last 6 months. I do have a sense of accomplishment. Some how it helps me realize that I am continuing towards my goals.
So what have I done with the Health Coach? We have spoken twice, the first time was an assessment, the second time was a check in on my goals. My first goals were to focus on my diet some, make sure I'm getting enough nuts and avocado into my diet. I was successful with that one. Now I am working on making sure that I log my food at least 5 times each week. In the meantime, I received a workbook that helps me to really look at things. Look at when I eat, what I eat, how I eat. Things that I am aware of w/ my kids, my patients, my wife, but not myself.
So for this week my goals are to eat 2 pieces of fruit at work each day. This isn't too hard for me as it is something I usually do, but I have found myself getting slack, so I thought I'd bring it back to the forefront. I have also made a goal of walking the parking lot here at work twice this week. Again, it is something that I can do, but have gotten out of the habit, so it is time to focus on it again.
The thing that I find most motivating is a card I received in the mail with my workbook that says when my next appointment with my Health Coach is but at the top, hand written in blue Sharpie, is Keep working towards your goal! It is amazing how that gives me a sense of I can do spirit. The spirit that brings back my strength and belief in myself. Trying to keep myself focused on the body's response to food and what I put into it rather than the emotional baggage that goes with the sabatoge and feeling of defeat. It's not easy, but I have written down a goal and am now working towards that. One week, one day, one meal, one snack, one hour at a time.
As I was walking by the lab this morning on my way to my office, I noticed that there was no one waiting for labs, so I made a quick detour and had my HA1c (diabetes test) drawn. Now considering I have had issues with eating, not activly restricting my diet, and not exercising, I was pretty sure my test would be greater than 8.0 and probably close to 9.0 which would show that my diabetes is very out of control. My lab came back at 7.1 which means it is slightly out of control, but not by much. Preference is below 7.0.
Not only was I relieved, I realized that all of the changes we made last year to our diets has translated into a healthier lifestyle. I felt like I had lost control and undone everything I had accomplished last year, but this shows that didn't happen. I do have to say, my last A1c in July of 2011 was 6.7, so it has increased in the last 6 months. I do have a sense of accomplishment. Some how it helps me realize that I am continuing towards my goals.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Starting from square one...again
Wow, it has been 6 weeks since my last blog. The holiday season has been rough. I've stopped working out and have gained 17 lbs of the 20 lbs. I lost over 2011. Over the last 6 weeks though, I have not totally given up. Here are a couple of my learnings at the end of 2011 which are giving me hope for 2012.
1) A big thank you goes out to Elizabeth Taylor!! She recommended the following video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PdJFbjWHEU Now the first hour of this video is about the paleo diet which I am not endorsing either for or against. What I found very interesting is the last half hour; he goes into how energy is produced at the cellular level and what happens when our glucose stores are full and why our body can't access our fat as energy.
What I really took away was that my fat body is starving and not being able to build muscle. What hit me more was that when the cell has made enough energy, the glucose goes to fat. Attached to regular sugar is a glucose and a fructose. The fructose stays out in the blood stream. Once this fructose hits a certain level, all fructose goes straight into fat. Sooooo, all these products with high FRUCTOSE corn syrup are not being utilized by the body for energy and are being made directly into fat!
This video does a great job of explaining why us fat people feel hungry all the time and especially for carbs. It explains how our muscles are wasting away which then decreases our ability to store glucagon which in turn creates more fat. I had all sorts of Ah Ha moments watching this. It doesn't matter what your science level is, he does a great job of explaining how the body works at a cellular level.
2) Thank you to Valerie Peterson-Barnes who has also turned me on to issues with wheat after she read a book called Wheat Belly. This book talks about the changes in how we grow wheat and when we harvest it and how this new wheat does not meet our bodies needs and adds to our weight issues.
Wheat, over the years, has been developed to grow faster, grow more, and is harvested at a different time in the developmental process than wheat in decades/centuries gone past. Our bodies do not know how to utilize this new wheat for nutrition and it appears that it is having an adverse effect on our bodies causing obesity and gluten intolerance.
3) I examined what I was doing and eating when I felt my best, it was avocados and nuts. When I felt my best, my labs were the healthiest I've ever had, and my energy level was normal, I was getting the right kind of fat from avocados and nuts. When I really started looking at my caloric intake, I started cutting out the nuts and avocado because of the high fat and calorie count. Over time, I started complaining of fatigue, lack of energy, and eventually lack of motivation to continue.
I have now added avocado and nuts back into my diet and have slowly began to notice a difference. I showered this morning and made Helen an omelet for breakfast. Again, it is a slow process, but I am beginning to get my head above water a little more often.
As to #1 and #2, interestingly enough, both changes started taking place in the 1980's which correlates with the obesity epidemic, especially in our children. Yes, video games, TV, and the fact that kids aren't able to just go out and play like we used to has a part in the obesity epidemic, but we aren't nurturing the body with food that provides energy and health. Our bodies are being riddled with foods that have no nutritional value and our default is to create fat.
Our family has made the decision to cut out as much high fructose corn syrup as possible. We are switching to more whole grains and less processed grains. Kat and I have decided to go Vegetarian again. Both of us have been Vegetarian at one point or another and we feel that, at least in our home, it is a way for us to make sure that the girls and us are exposed to the least amount of unhealthy hormones and antibiotics as we can. We do eat meat outside of the house when visiting family and friends and the occassional night eating out.
Kat and I have taken to making our own cereal, granola, and pasta. I have found recipies on how to make our own vanilla extract and fruit roll ups. The girls are having difficulty adjusting I have to admit. Little Miss Helen told me yesterday that she doesn't want to be vegetarian because she wants to be able to eat bacon and hamburgers. Abigail is trying, but I am noticing that she is eating less at dinner than in the past; on the other hand, she LOVES the granola that Kat makes.
So here I sit, 262.6 lbs as of this morning. I am more comfortable in many ways with myself, but am finding that this battle is exhausting and one that I don't feel very confident I am going to win. Because of this, I have signed up for health coaching through Kaiser to work on my behaviors. I realize I can case manage the most complex patients (many are obese) but can't case manage me, so I'm asking for some help.
I keep looking for ways to make sure my body is healthy; make sure that what I am eating can be utilized by my body to make it work more effectivly. I hope that in doing this I will find a way to help my children learn how to treat their bodies so they don't wind up in the same situation I'm in.
Shalom
1) A big thank you goes out to Elizabeth Taylor!! She recommended the following video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PdJFbjWHEU Now the first hour of this video is about the paleo diet which I am not endorsing either for or against. What I found very interesting is the last half hour; he goes into how energy is produced at the cellular level and what happens when our glucose stores are full and why our body can't access our fat as energy.
What I really took away was that my fat body is starving and not being able to build muscle. What hit me more was that when the cell has made enough energy, the glucose goes to fat. Attached to regular sugar is a glucose and a fructose. The fructose stays out in the blood stream. Once this fructose hits a certain level, all fructose goes straight into fat. Sooooo, all these products with high FRUCTOSE corn syrup are not being utilized by the body for energy and are being made directly into fat!
This video does a great job of explaining why us fat people feel hungry all the time and especially for carbs. It explains how our muscles are wasting away which then decreases our ability to store glucagon which in turn creates more fat. I had all sorts of Ah Ha moments watching this. It doesn't matter what your science level is, he does a great job of explaining how the body works at a cellular level.
2) Thank you to Valerie Peterson-Barnes who has also turned me on to issues with wheat after she read a book called Wheat Belly. This book talks about the changes in how we grow wheat and when we harvest it and how this new wheat does not meet our bodies needs and adds to our weight issues.
Wheat, over the years, has been developed to grow faster, grow more, and is harvested at a different time in the developmental process than wheat in decades/centuries gone past. Our bodies do not know how to utilize this new wheat for nutrition and it appears that it is having an adverse effect on our bodies causing obesity and gluten intolerance.
3) I examined what I was doing and eating when I felt my best, it was avocados and nuts. When I felt my best, my labs were the healthiest I've ever had, and my energy level was normal, I was getting the right kind of fat from avocados and nuts. When I really started looking at my caloric intake, I started cutting out the nuts and avocado because of the high fat and calorie count. Over time, I started complaining of fatigue, lack of energy, and eventually lack of motivation to continue.
I have now added avocado and nuts back into my diet and have slowly began to notice a difference. I showered this morning and made Helen an omelet for breakfast. Again, it is a slow process, but I am beginning to get my head above water a little more often.
As to #1 and #2, interestingly enough, both changes started taking place in the 1980's which correlates with the obesity epidemic, especially in our children. Yes, video games, TV, and the fact that kids aren't able to just go out and play like we used to has a part in the obesity epidemic, but we aren't nurturing the body with food that provides energy and health. Our bodies are being riddled with foods that have no nutritional value and our default is to create fat.
Our family has made the decision to cut out as much high fructose corn syrup as possible. We are switching to more whole grains and less processed grains. Kat and I have decided to go Vegetarian again. Both of us have been Vegetarian at one point or another and we feel that, at least in our home, it is a way for us to make sure that the girls and us are exposed to the least amount of unhealthy hormones and antibiotics as we can. We do eat meat outside of the house when visiting family and friends and the occassional night eating out.
Kat and I have taken to making our own cereal, granola, and pasta. I have found recipies on how to make our own vanilla extract and fruit roll ups. The girls are having difficulty adjusting I have to admit. Little Miss Helen told me yesterday that she doesn't want to be vegetarian because she wants to be able to eat bacon and hamburgers. Abigail is trying, but I am noticing that she is eating less at dinner than in the past; on the other hand, she LOVES the granola that Kat makes.
So here I sit, 262.6 lbs as of this morning. I am more comfortable in many ways with myself, but am finding that this battle is exhausting and one that I don't feel very confident I am going to win. Because of this, I have signed up for health coaching through Kaiser to work on my behaviors. I realize I can case manage the most complex patients (many are obese) but can't case manage me, so I'm asking for some help.
I keep looking for ways to make sure my body is healthy; make sure that what I am eating can be utilized by my body to make it work more effectivly. I hope that in doing this I will find a way to help my children learn how to treat their bodies so they don't wind up in the same situation I'm in.
Shalom
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