My Pants!

So I've been more lax on the food thing.  I haven't been eating anywhere near what I used to, but my choices are not the best right now.  Also, I am bloated and just feeling fat in general.  Today, my pants are snug...not tight...but not as loose as I am used to. 

As I am lamenting on this fact I realized...yes, these pants feel snug, but they are also a size smaller!  By acknowledging the success I have had my mind set is changing.  Yes, I am feeling fat, but I am fat.  Yes, I know I'm not closely watching every morsel I put in my mouth, but I know that the amount of food I used to eat and the amount of food I eat now are drastically different.  And most of all, snug pants aren't a bad thing when it is a size less than you are used to your snug pants being :D

It is the small goals that help keep me focused.  It is hard to recognize and acknowledge the small victories.  What I caught myself doing today showed me how easy it is to overlook them.  My pants feel snug, snug equals feeling fat, feeling fat equals feeling depressed.  I've had this feeling before, many time before.  With the familiar feeling, came my usual reactions.  By acknowledging that I am a size smaller, I have interrupted that feedback loop and feel better about myself.  If I can keep this in mind, I should be able to lay down new neural pathways that will begin to change my reactions to the feeling of snug pants.

In many ways I feel like Yoda was speeding to me "You must unlearn what you have learned". As a Mom, I realize there are many things that we do as parents that our children will have to unlearn as adults. I know that years of snug pants lead me to the feelings I have about snug pants, it is now time to let those feelings go and learn a better way to react to snug pants. I am now on the hunt for other things that I must unlearn. Other places where my reactions are left over from years of negative input and continue to embrace the challenge of unlearning. As Bruce the shark from Nemo....I am not a mindless eating machine. It takes awareness and a willingness to look at what may not be pretty, but those are things that can be changed. Cheers to change!!